Dating Mr. Body
Below is a link to our first post for Patti Stanger’s blog the United States of Dating
Or Read Below:
Dating Mr. Body
Is it just us? Or is there a new trend plaguing the guys of Nashville where they are just as self conscious, if not MORE SO, than girls when it comes to weight and body image? Stereotypically it’s the girl who orders no dressing on a salad, and says, “trying to watch my carbs” or, “I shouldn’t” when offered sweets. No, we aren’t fans of this behavior, but you have to admit that it is present among women, and now sadly men.
This is our fair warning, you might think your next date is an attractive man who happens to love taking care of his body while maintaining normal “manly-man” attributes. And why wouldn’t you? However, the sad truth is, this date of yours could actually be a Mr. Body Conscious type. We shall call him Mr. Body for short, and when you are on a date with him, this is generally what you’re in for.
It all begins with the drink order. Mr. Body will struggle between beer that “makes him bloated” or wine that “has too much sugar”. Struggles like this make you want to spit out your Cab Sav! You wanted a date with a man, not a night out with a girlfriend on a diet. Until recently, we weren’t even aware guys knew how to count carbs, calories, sugar content etc. The classic lines of, “let’s split a bottle of wine” or “I’ll have a Budweiser” which we had all grown so fond of have now been replaced.
You wanted a date with a man, not a night out with a girlfriend on a diet.
You can’t help but roll your eyes at his drink struggles, when sure enough, the starter bread bowl arrives to the table. What is better to start a lovely evening than a piece of warm sourdough dipped in oil? Well, if you’re on a date with Mr. Body, you better believe that bowl will go untouched. This is not only annoying, but it also makes you feel like a pig if you are interested in eating some of that bread. We miss the days when guys barbarically ripped apart the loaf, leaving crumbs all over the table as they eagerly ate.
Mr. Body really takes it to the next level with main course. “Should we just split some small appetizers?” or “I’m not really that hungry” are normal phrases that you can expect to hear. At this point, you begin to kick yourself for not snacking before your date. Traditional gender roles of the man as the “eater” have been so ingrained in us that you are taken aback by his lack of interest in the meal, meanwhile your stomach continues to quietly growl.
Since he is Mr. Body and ordering light, you have lost the confidence to order the lobster mac and cheese that you actually want.
Since he is Mr. Body and ordering light, you have lost the confidence to order the lobster mac and cheese that you actually want.You sigh as salads have now been ordered by both male and female counterparts with dressings on the side, no cheese, grilled not fried chicken, please and thank you. As you pick at your dry salad with no cheese you realize that half the part of going out to eat has been ruined for you; the “splurge” aspect on some delicacy you could never make on your own.Your mind starts to wander about how long you could possibly continue to dine with this man and be in constant fear of your food choices being judged.
On to the desert option. Yes, the word option was used, because it will remain as that; an option. A comment is most likely made about not wanting to have to work it off tomorrow at the gym or the classic “I really don’t like sweets”. Come on man! Everyone loves a dessert, and if you claim you don’t, you’re a liar.
The date finally comes to an end, and you are left feeling less than satisfied by the food, the conversations about abstaining from “splurges”, and the romantic prospect as a whole. You wish someone could tell this Mr. Body that his faults are simple and completely fixable. To succeed on a date, he needs to learn how to keep his Mr. Body-ness to himself, especially on dates with a beautiful girl.
When a guy acts like a Mr. Body does, he makes the girl feel like she should be THAT self-conscious too, leaving her feeling even more insecure.
It is basic knowledge that girls are already self conscious on dates and about their bodies in general. Why else would it be considered a faux pas to ask a girl her weight or age? When we go on dates with a guy we want to feel tiny, pretty, and girly. We feel more like this when a guy acts like a real man. This includes ordering beer, red meat, and eating that damn bread with confidence! He would never talk about calorie counting, weight, or having to “work off” any food or drink. When a guy acts like a Mr. Body does, he makes the girl feel like she should be THAT self-conscious too, leaving her feeling even more insecure. What should have been a laid back and enjoyable evening is now an undiscussed anxiety filled, body conscious frenzy. Hate to break it to ya Mr. Body, but a second date will happen… never.
We sincerely hope the days of manly-men are not gone and lost forever. But in the mean time, beware of finding yourself on a date with Mr. Body. Our only tip thus far to avoid being tricked by a seemingly normal well-groomed man who is secretly a Mr. Body; avoid accepting dates from guy you meet at the downtown YMCA (chalk full of cuties, darn!), Barrys Bootcamp, Cross-fit, and all other exercise related activities!